FoF: Welcome to Fuck Off Friday

This post has been percolating in my head all week. I honestly could not wait for today to come to roll it out. Then, my very good friend and blogger buddy had a spectacularly craptacular week, and it is as if the heavens sanctioned my new version of a bitchfest.

Fridays will present the opportunity to tell someone to Fuck Off!! I may not do it every week, but you are welcome to join in by commenting. If you want to post on your own site just link back here because I'd love to read it.

After everything that has gone on this week I cannot even remember my original reason for wanting to create this post. So:

A huge FUCK OFF to trolls who come to websites and leave nasty comments for the sole purpose of hurting someone's feelings. You are mean-spirited. You are hateful. You should be ashamed of yourselves.

I've Been Tagged--and Boy Do I Need It

As you can see from the post below, my week has been just wretched. Military Mom tagged me for a meme, and that is pretty cool because I need a little love right now.


How long have you been blogging?
This blog got started in March of 07, but I have a family blog that I have had for a few years.

What inspired you to start your blog, and who are your mentors?
This blog got started because I was so sick and tired of seeing all these stupid moms around me doing stupid things. I can only bitch to my husband so much, and the mom board I belonged to had a no debate policy. Since I have no friends in real life, and I needed to get a bunch of stuff off of my chest, this blog was born.

I am in too pissy a mood today to think of anyone who is my mentor. This whole blogging project has been an exercise in resourcefulness. Everything I have done I taught myself to do. Thank god for G**gle.

Are you trying to make money on-line, or are you just doing it for fun?
I started blogging to help my mental health, i.e. stop complaining to Hubbie about his mom. I did not realize what a great community I would find on here. I make money online in other ways. This blog is not one of them.

What 3 things do you love about being on-line?
1. Meeting interesting people who actually know random tidbits of information.
2. I can blow off steam and not worry about the people in my life knowing about it.
3. It gives me something to do that is just for me.

What 3 things do you struggle with on-line?
1. Finding cool people and wishing I could actually sit down and have a coffee with them.
2. Wanting to find more time to blog.
3. Needing to spend more time with my family and not blogging.

I'm tagging Buddha Girl and Blue Mamma. I hope the pox on my house does not extend to them through this meme.

I've Been Tagged! My Favorite Things

My girl Military Mom tagged me today! WooHoo! The meme is for five of my favorite things, so here were go.

Burro de la Roqueta. Oh. My. God. Or should I say Ay. Dios. Mio. I eat these when I am visiting my folks. The description on the menu is as follows:

El Burro A La Roqueta (soft flour tortilla filled with delicious shredded pork, grilled onions topped with melted cheese and pico de gallo. Choice of rice or beans).

It really depends on who is cooking the food on that particular day. Sometimes you can really taste the beer (yum!) and other times it is really bland. Just the fact that they dump a ton of cheese dip on it makes it my ultimate favorite. I would eat it three times a week if I could. The only downside is that they only offer rice or beans. Stingy bastards. Though after doing a little internet searching it appears other restaurants will let you have both. I did not even know that other restaurants served this dish. Looks like I will have to start a local search.

Raisinets. I have loved these since I was a kid. I started eating them again when I was preggo and have not stopped since. I almost fell on the floor when they came out with the dark chocolate variety, but have to say that I really could not tell much of a difference. I guess because I like really really (did I say really) dark chocolate I would just as well go with their original product. Raisinets are the only milk chocolate I will eat. I always keep a box on hand here at the house. LittleBird has started to enjoy them as an after nap snack. Though we do not tend to let her eat candy, I figure a handful of chocolate raisins isn't too bad of a compromise.

Voyager. Yes I am a total dork. Every day I bless the execs at Spike TV for giving me my daily Janeway fix. I make a point of explaining to LittleBird that girls can be captains. Girls can be in charge. Every time I talk about Janeway my dad has to give me his whole Captain Kirk lecture. I don't care. Janeway is where it's at.


Babybel Cheese. This is my breakfast. Every day. I have a giant piece of Swedish knäck, butter it and cut up a circle of BabyBel cheese on top. It is similar to what I had for breakfast when I lived in Sweden and it is something that agrees with my stomach. I have never been a morning or a breakfast person. I usually feel pretty queasy if I eat too early. So I buy these at your favorite bulk grocery store and don't look like a liar when I tell my kids that breakfast is the most important meal of the day and that they have to eat it.

Chai Latte. Any brand, any powdered form. I have not yet found my favorite, so I am open to suggestions. I use milk instead of water to make it more rich. This is how I got started with our "girlie tea" with LittleBird. I would make a cup of my chai latte, we would sit on the floor together and take turn sipping out of my mug. It was the start of a great tradition.


So now I am tagging Patois, BellaDrama, Latté Girl and Blue Momma. Let's see those favs, ladies!!

MIL Monday: Christmas Cookies and Cigarettes

It's Monday! Time for another MIL story!

Since Christmas is on the way, I thought I would share a funny from when I thought I was going to learn how to bake traditional Swedish holiday cookies.

MIL asked me if I wanted to help her bake some Christmas cookies. I was psyched. I love to bake, and I am all about learning more about Hubbie's culture.

We get started making three or so recipes. And these are not out-of-a-package recipes. These are the roll-the-dough, twist-into-shape kind of labor-intensive cookies. I am all for it though. Until she asks me if I have got the hang of things. I need to go have a cigarette, she tells me.

And never came back.

Bitch left me in the kitchen rolling and pinching and twisting these cookies for hours while she smoked her cigs and drank her coffee with the rest of the family.

Hubbie, who was just bf at the time, came in to see what was going on. We both had a good laugh about it because we should not have been surprised at her behavior.

The next year when she asked me if I wanted to bake cookies, I was all the wiser. My answer was a big, fat, resounding NO.

Now don't get me wrong. I love love love to bake and cook. But I see it as a social thing. You talk and laugh. It is warm. Friendly. Hours go by and you don't even notice. Hell if MIL is going to take advantage of that and trick me into doing her work for her. It would have been one thing if she had asked me to do the baking. But do not act like we are going to have girlie time together and then sneak out the door and leave it all to me to do by my lonesome.

Any MIL stories you guys want to share? Good or bad? It is MIL Monday, afterall.

10/Tues: Songs That Bring Back Memories

So I am a week late on this. I totally stole this from Patois' site. I read it last week, but did not have the chance to post my own since I was on "vacation" at my parents' house.

I have altered this a bit. Instead of ten songs that "bring me back," this is ten songs that define me or had a significant impact.

1. The Warrior, Scandal. I love this song. It makes me feel like a badass. When I first heard it as a kid, it make me feel like I could kick the world's ass. I love that it still makes me feel that way.




2. Big County, Big Country. When I lived in Sweden, this song carried me through some really tough times. The lyric: I'm not expecting to grow flowers in the desert, but I can live and breathe and see the sun winter time made my heart ache. Stockholm is dark in the winter. I loved it like that at Christmas. But by February/March I was ready for Spring and a little more sunlight. Having grown up in the desert, this line really got to me.





3. Let It Be, J. Lennon. This song seems to come on every time I am in a panic about something. I now have it on my mp3 player so I have it on hand whenever I need it.


4. I Go To Extremes, Billy Joel. This song is me. Through and through. I realized it in college, and it has been one way of easily defining myself. I just can't understand how Mr. Joel got into my head.


5. Edelweiss. I now know that this song was not originally sung by the von Trapp family. But the emotion behind the song in the film as Captain von Trapp looks out at the audience still takes my breath away. To know that he took his family and climbed those mountains. Sure there was not a majestic orchestra playing in the background, but I am sure he turned around and knew he would not see his home for a long time. If ever. What strength that must have taken. To make the moral decision that was right for him and his family. As I have gotten older I have been in a position to leave based on my principles or stay. And I have walked. Every time.


6. Changes In Latitudes, Changes In Attitudes, Jimmy Buffett. Another song that got me through dark and difficult times when I lived overseas. I knew I needed a change, but it took a lot to get me to make it. This song, along with several on the same album helped me express what I was feeling.


7. Carmen SanDiego, Rockapella. I loved this computer game as a kid. I never watched the TV program for which this song is the theme, but it reminds me of the time I spent on my mom's old IBM playing Carmen SD. It really shaped my love of history and geography. And Carmen SD is a badass. I love her.


8. Kyrie, Mr. Mister. Seriously one of the best songs ever. If you sit down and actually analyze the lyrics they are pretty powerful. I do not have any tattoos, but if I did get one it would be based on this.


9. I'm Sensitive, Jewel. I heard this song and just felt like it fit me. I was always accused of being overly sensitive as a child. My response was always better to be overly sensitive than not sensitive enough. No wonder I grew up to be so defensive and use humor to deflect uncomfortable emotions. LOL I love the tone and message of this song. I feel it is important to raise both my daughter and son this way.


10. The One and Only, Chesney Hawkes. Another one that I feel totally defines me. We all struggle to make our mark and be unique. This song has always resonated with me. I have often felt that there were not any other people just like me. It has always been hard to find my niche. I like that this song celebrates being different.
    

Monday Meme: Directional Traveling?

So here is a Meme I am making up myself. How far north, south, east and west have you traveled on this earth?

For me:

The farthest north I have been is Leksand, Sweden.
The farthest south I have been is Puerto Rico/The Virgin Islands.
The farthest east I have been is Bjelovar, Croatia.
The farthest west I have been is Hawai'i.

I am tagging Blue Mamma, Coalminer Heather, Patois, Aithne, and Anglophile Football Fanatic. I look forward to reading your answers!

Thurs13: 13 Reasons Not To Bring Your Toddlers To T*rget

13 Reasons Not To Bring Your Toddlers To T*rget

1. There are no cup holders in the cart for your Starbucks
2. The dollars bins are too exciting, and they want one of everything
3. Your two year-old will want to help you push the cart, not ride in it
4. She will help you pick out clothes by pulling things off of the rack, telling you how pretty it is, then stuffing it onto the bottom rack of the cart
5. You will have to physically remove her from said clothing section because she wants to look "at just one more thing"
6. When shopping for "ballerina clothes" for her dance class, once you remove her sneakers you will not be allowed to put them back on without a knock-down drag-out fight
   
7. She will lay on the floor because she NEEDS a pretty belt, but you won't put it in the cart
8. One year old will wake up, want a taste of your Starbucks and scream when he can't have any
9. You will stand in the wrong line at the register
10. The one year-old will scream at the indignity of it all
11. Your two year-old will hop up and down yelling that she has to pee
12. The lady behind you will continually comment on how "He just wants to be picked up"
13. When you finally get the two year-old into the bathroom and tell her not to touch the toilet, she will immediately walk over to the seat and put her hands on it while you struggle with screaming one year-old
    

For more Thursday 13

Dona Nobis Pacem

Read about Blogging For Peace

I've Been Tagged!! Desktop Meme

Blue Momma over at Life in the Fish Bowl has tagged me with a meme. Sadly, in keeping with today's nerd theme, this only reinforces what a dork I am.

My challenge today was to take a screen shot of my desktop and post it. Pics of the kids? Nope. Of sexy hubbie? Nuh-uh. I've got the DaVinci background that comes with my computer.

AND I LOVE IT!

There is something so calming and soothing about it. Maybe it is the History major in me, but it makes me smile every time I turn on my laptop. And I love the music that accompanies this theme. I wouldn't normally find a harpsichord something I would choose to listen to on a regular basis, but I do like the sound bytes they have created for this theme.

So, now I need to tag some people. I guess it will be the usual suspects:

Coalminer's Granddaughter
Belladrama
Military Mom
Patois

What's on YOUR screen? And tell us the story behind it!


Totally stolen from Blue Momma--but why reinvent the wheel? Ok, if you're not tagged you can stop reading here. Or you can consider yourself tagged and keep reading for the instructions. I'm putting them here because, well, because they're boring.

And you probably know this stuff anyway. But just in case you don't:

My Desktop Free View Instructions:

A. Upon receiving this tag, immediately perform a screen capture of your desktop. It is best that no icons be deleted before the screen capture so as to add to the element of fun. You can do a screen capture by:

[1] Going to your desktop and pressing the Print Scrn key (located on the right side of the F12 key).

[2] Open a graphics program (like Picture Manager, Paint, or Photoshop) and do a Paste CTRL + V).

[3] If you wish, you can “edit” the image, before saving it.

B. Post the picture in your blog. You can also give a short explanation on the look of your desktop just below it if you want. You can explain why you preferred such look or why is it full of icons. Things like that.

C. Tag five of your friends and ask them to give you a Free View of their desktop as well.

Just Call Me the Meme Bandit

I was catching up on my reading over at Blue Momma's corner of the blogosphere and loved the meme she was tagged with today. I am totally stealing it because it looks really fun and creative. And boy, do I need a little bit of that this week. I deliberately did not read all of her answers because I did not want to be influenced by her kickass wit and be even more of a wimpy copy cat. So here goes. This is my first meme, so indulge me...

1. Your rock star name: (first pet, current car) Georgina Cherokee. I've already cheated by not saying Jeep. You have to admit, Georgina Jeep just does not have the cool ring to it that Georgina Cherokee does. I could be a customer on LA Ink with that one.

2. Your gangster name: (favorite ice cream, favorite cookie) Chocolate Malted Crunch Cowboy. Damn that is a mouthful. I think I would have to wear a t-shirt that said, "Don't Squat With Your Spurs On". And now I am going to have to bake those damned cowboy cookies.

3. Your fly guy/girl name: (first initial first name, first 3 letters last name) - MMik. Okay. That is just lame. Wuz up, MMik? Nah. Though it is hard not to do the whole head-bobble thing when you say it aloud.

4. Your detective name: (favorite color, favorite animal) Green Owl. This is a great question for me because the animal changes all the time. They would never be able to track me down! Muuuuhaaaaaaaah!

5. Your soap opera name: (middle name, birth city) Ann LongBeach. And with fingers just dripping with diamonds, gorgeous.

6. Your Star Wars name (first three letter last name, first 2 letter of first name): MikMi. Sounds like that damned Beaker from the Muppets. Sadly, I actually had my own Star Wars name back in the day. Good lord, am I a geek.

7. Superhero Name: (2nd favorite color, favorite drink and add "the") The Blue White Russian. I could freeze your ass off with just a glance. And drink you under the table. With a big fur hat, ice blue eyes and steel stilettos. Okay, I am starting to get turned on.

8. Nascar name (first names of your grandfathers): George Roy. I had to say this because Roy George just went in totally the wrong direction.

9. Stripper Name: (favorite perfume, favorite candy): White Shoulders Mounds. That is wrong on so many levels. Especially considering my post regarding the funeral I play on having for my boobs.

10. Witness Protection Name: (mother's and father's middle name): Ann Peter. I would probably kill myself with a name like that. There would be no reason to put me into protection.



Hey! That was fun! Cathartic! I can almost stand to go spend time with my kids again. Now, I am tagging:

Aithne over at Belladrama: Because she needs a break from TTM.
Nicole over at I Have To Find My Sanity Somewhere: Because her life has been in the shitter lately.
Military Mom: Because she is new to this whole blogging scene and is a cool lady
Heather over at Confessions of a Coal Miner's Daughter because I love her sense of humor, and since I do not think Nicole will have the time to do this meme, she makes three. LOL