Friday, April 4, 2008

The Face Of Betrayal

I would like to share with you one of my most profound moments of betrayal.

Two points are necessary to set the scene. First, during my summer stint as a university student in Spain, we would hit the discoteques on the weekends to blow off steam from studying all week. I have never been a big drinker but I love to dance. I am good at it, and in my hey day I could go out every night of the week and never tire of it.

Second, as an English-speaker studying abroad, most pick-up lines would involve practicing English. Whether the intention was to have a cup of coffee or a pretense for hooking up, that was the direction the majority of our conversations would turn.

The combination of these two points is the heart of this story.

One night at our favorite discoteque we were dancing our hearts out. We weren't drinking, just dancing and laughing and having a great time. There were little groups of guys flirting with us at different times, but nothing we were really interested in. A girl or two joined our group, dancing with us, chatting in the general manner one sees when out in a club. She told us her friends wanted to meet with us, that because we were American that they wanted to practice their English with pretty American girls. We said thanks, but no thanks.

We weren't looking for the hassle of flirting with Spanish men. All we wanted to do was dance.

We got thirsty, and the soda machines were upstairs outside on the curb. We girls decided to go up and get a drink. Myself, my American roommate, and these nice, sweet Spanish girls.

We got upstairs, and as we start reading the vending machine a group of guys came out and surrounded us. Or shall I say a gang of guys? The same ones from the club. They were laughing and flirting and joking. Come to another club with us? Please! Please! This other club is so much fun! The music is better! Come! Let's go!

We blow them off, tell them we have our friends here. Thanks but no thanks.

The guys started to get aggressive. Then angry. They wouldn't take no for an answer.

The only way to describe what happened is to say they started trying to herd us into the alley next to the club. We realized that they were not going to let us back into the club, and they were using their bodies to get into our personal space so that we would back up further and further, thereby moving us away from our friends and into that alley.

In the split second I realized what they were doing, I looked up. At the back of the crowd I saw her. Our Spanish "girlfriend". With a smirk on her face. She had set the whole thing up. Having convinced us to come upstairs to cool off and get something to drink, she got us into exactly the situation that her gang of male friends wanted.

I had never felt so betrayed in my life.

It had never occurred to me that a fellow girl would sell us out. How naive I was.


Momma said...

Wow, I'm really sorry you had a night like that in your life. I am afraid to ask what happened next or what jogged this memory for you. Having been betrayed by a few girls in my time (though not to that extent), I know that sinking feeling when you realize that maybe we're not all in this together, that maybe some women are just sociopathic bitches.

{{{{virtual hugs to you}}}}}}

Peace - D

Not Afraid to Use It said...

Don't be afraid to ask! The rest of the story is divine intervention. Our two best guy friends came upstairs to get a soda, and we told them to stand by us. They helped escort us back into the club, which was no mean feat.

BvB gave me a copy of Eat Pray Love in that care package, and something about reading about the author's time in Italy jogged my memory today. It is something I will be sure to instill in LittleBird--be just as wary of women. Guys can be great, girls can be great. But don't trust a girl just because she is a girl.

hollystar said...

lame. its horrible that people (in general) attempt to gain trust just to deceive. people suck sometimes. it was one thing when i was just looking out for myself, but, now that i'm a parent, other people scare the shit out of me.

totally of today's topic, but i thought i should share. i occassionally read your blog to my husband when he asks wtf i'm laughing at. knowing that, on this year's anniversary card i wrote to "the man would share a glass with". i just thought you should know how deeply you affect our lives...


hollystar said...

oh! and zicam is worth a shot imo. i feel loads better after just a couple days.

also, my ear, nose and throat doctor (a long history of ear infections has made that man my new best friend) highly believes in that vicks early defense spray. i typically HATE nasal sprays (the shoot you in the eye kind), but this spray is more of a mist and isnt quite as aggressive. it kinda stinks though. maybe worth a shot since its readily avaliable.

that is all the offerings i have when it comes to things to stick up your nose at this time.

maggie, dammit said...

Oh, wow.

I've got chills now.


Not Afraid to Use It said...

@hollystar: Love that you share this with your man, and SUPER cool that you wrote that on your anniversary card! My hubbie with think that is pretty awesome, too!

As for those other people scaring the shit out of you, amen to that. It's not my kids I worry about, it's all the other crazy fuckers out there.

@Maggie: Me too. It was one of those situations that I was allowed to have a heart attack at my leisure. We were "rescued" fairly quickly. It was only after that the reality of the situation sunk it. What a near miss we really had.

krishanna said...

What a stupid bitch. How horrible and scary. Did you smack her with some sort of hammer of retribution? (Sorry, I have bee MIA recently...lots happening)Will post in abit.

buddha_girl said...

Holy hell.

I now want to travel to Spain, bring back the grown-up version of that cunt, and allow my students to fuck her up. Perhaps we could even drop her off in a bad part of my city just for shits and giggles.

Momma said...

I'm so glad there was divine intervention! Thank all that's holy.

By the way, "Eat Pray Love" is one of my favorite books. I refuse to loan it to anyone, because I plan to drag it out for a good re-read when life gets me down.

Love it.

Peace - D

Not Afraid to Use It said...

@krishanna: Glad to see you back, babe! We missed you!

@Buddha_Girl: Only if Prison Popcorn Boy gets in on the action. LOL

Yeah, it makes you wonder what kind of person she grew to be, and what kind of life she leads.

@Momma: Yeah, I don't think this is a book I will be able to let go of. It's just too good. I can see myself rereading it several times.

Gypsy said...

These types of things happened to me when I studied abroad in Italy, too. It was never very sinister, but definitely uncomfortable. But the girl setting it up? That's a new one to me.

P.S. I accidentally deleted your comment on my post about Dan in Real Life. Ack!

Not Afraid to Use It said...

@Gypsy: I think that is what made me so mad--I just could not fathom a woman allowing another woman to be dragged down an alley to god knows what, and on purpose at that.

I had wondered what was going on with my comment. I know I hit the publish button, but then I started to doubt myself but I didn't want to send another comment in case you were just backlogged. Sigh. That's what I get for over-analyzing everything.