Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Rise of the Mullet

We have been getting slammed in DC with crazy snowstorms. I have to admit I have loved nearly every minute of it. Not the fact that my kids are in their third week off of school. Or the fact that my husband had to take a suitcase to work and shack up in his office. But I love the heavy white blanket of snow that just keeps piling on. We've got heat. We've got food. We've got internet. I can't think of anything better.

Sadly, our idyllic Currier & Ives postcard was shattered Saturday morning after my daughter struck a pose for us in the living room. She had been instructed to brush her teeth and comb her hair after breakfast. Having been in the back of the house for a significant period of time, she returned to the living room, clasped her hands together and waited.

I stopped sipping my coffee. There was something not quite right. The light from the window filtered through her hair. Or shall I say, what was left of it.

My daughter had cut off all her hair.

She had found my hair-cutting shears, and as my husband and I luxuriated with our Swedish coffee and snugly bathrobes she decided to give herself trim. A mullet, no less.

First off, I am so grateful that she did not slice her cheek open or cut her finger off. Those scissors are sharp, and even I have nicked myself on occasion. We took her into the bathroom to survey the damage, and the closest approximation I can come up with is that I am now the proud mother of a Hayley Mills look-a-like.

We salvaged what we could by taking off nearly four inches from the back. We are hoping that we can even things out as it grows. With a headband on, it almost looks layered. Almost. She could have cut it off at the skull, but thankfully she must have pulled it around to her cheek to see what she was doing. My five year old now looks like she has mutton chops, but I can live with that.

On a side note, my sister wanted to know if I had spanked my daughter for doing this. I guess I shouldn't be surprised that she asked, but I told her no way. The appearance of deep, racking sobs when my daughter realized she didn't have long princess hair was punishment enough.


Anonymous said...

Sometimes the deed is its own punishment. Lucky for your daughter, you're wise to this already.

Poor kid, poor you. I think nearly every girl makes that error in judgment at least once...

Mirth said...

You got pictures right? Not for today obviously, for later. When she's a teenager and you suddenly become a complete dunderhead in her opinion. That's when you whip that one out. And yeah, reality is punishment enough in this case for sure.

KC said...

I hear mullets are making a comeback. I could see this happening at our place, but with the electric clippers, and a much more painful transition back to the normal-haired.

A Free Man said...

Mullets are disturbingly coming back into fashion (or more accurately, never went out) among a certain type of people down here, so ship her down. She can hang out with the bogans.

Joe @ IrrationalDad said...

Spank her? What? I just... what? I mean, she shouldn't be playing with scissors, but spank her? I can't wrap my head around this.

I hope you took pictures to torment her with when she gets older. And brings boys home.

Patois said...

But you did slap her hard across the face, right?

Glad she didn't cut off her phalanges. (Proof that I watch "Bones.")

Cristin said...

I didn't know you were in DC.

A hairdresser gave me a mullet a few years ago. My husband came home for lunch and found me crying in the bathroom. He fixed my hair with a pair of bandage scissors and wanted to go tear that hairdresser a new ass hole.

Kat said...

Oh my god! Pretty funny, though. Just teach her to say, "Party in the back!" if she gets any strange looks.