Monday, June 23, 2008

Moron Monday: Cat? What Cat?

Had a friend over for a playdate today with her kids. I was in and out of the house getting snacks, drinks, diapers. The works.

I sit down for a breather, and LittleBird shrieks Look Mamma! A kitty!

I look along our back fence line. Oh yeah! I say, That is a kitty!

Squint the eyes, then widen them in horror.

Wait a minute. That's our cat!!!

I jump up and book it barefoot across our backyard. My fucker of a cat slips between the fences and into our neighbor's yard. No amount of coaxing, muttered threats or swearing will get her to come near me.

I walk back across the lawn to where my friend is sitting. Isn't your cat allowed outside? she asked.

Um, no. They don't go out. Ever.

Oh, she said. LittleMan has been pointing at the cat walking around the yard while you were in the house and saying Kitty! Kitty!

Seriously? Don't you think that might have been pertinent information to tell me when I came back outside? The fact that my almost two year old can figure out something is wrong, but you don't seem to have a clue?

Moron. Total fucking moron.

She's still my friend. We'll still have playdates. But what a dumbass. Seriously.

10 comments:

Sarah said...

Hey NATUI--thanks for swinging by my blog. Warning: I do feel like a stupid mom from time to time.

Not Afraid to Use It said...

@Sarah: You are welcome! I loved your blog. As for the feeling like a stupid mom--me too. Sadly, it seems to be more often than not lately.

Krysta said...

I want to kill my friends that are like that...arg!

Sherrie said...

My friend has a landlady who insists cats should be allowed outdoors and "accidentally" lets her cat out once a week.

DROPKICK.

But may I say, that that shot of you in college is just about the cutest pic I ever saw. You make the 80s sexy!

Molly's Mom said...

Holy crap! I have nightmares about my cats escaping...they wouldn't know what the hell to do outside! I'm assuming you were able to catch it?

Not Afraid to Use It said...

@Krysta: Yeah, some people just don't think. But I love her anyway!

@Sherrie: That is TOTALLY fucked up! I would call that a lease breaker.

@Molly's Mom: We did catch her. After I trekked around the neighborhood in sport shorts and an ugly tankini top. Sigh. I know she wants to go out again.

MommyWizdom said...

Maybe I missed something, but how was your friend supposed to know your cat doesn't go outside? It's not odd to let cats outside. Half our neighbor's cats are outside all day long without a problem.
I guess I'm playing devil's advocate :-)
I'm glad you got her back safe and sound.

Gypsy said...

Gah! I hate that feeling of a pet on the loose.

Coal Miner's Granddaughter said...

Oh that's special. Reminds me of the time our friend let our cat out of the house. On purpose. Yeah, we don't speak to him anymore.

buddha_girl said...

Hellacious.

That's all.