Monday, December 29, 2008

This Sort of Thing Ain't My Bag, Baby

I feel like I am a pretty simplistic girl when it comes to my clothes. I like solid colors, boot cut jeans, and clunky shoes to keep me grounded.

In the past, I have been known to cut the labels off of the back of my jeans because the companies aren't paying me to advertise their clothes. I wouldn't know a pair of Jimmy Choos or Manolo Blahniks if they kicked me in the ass. And yes, I Googled both brands of shoes to make sure I'd spelled them correctly.

When one of the Christmas presents from my mom turned out to be a Coach purse, I was a bit shocked. Speechless, in fact. Now, it is a genuine knock-off from her trip to Greece, but that does not change the fact that it is Coach purse. The pattern screams Coach. Screams it.

I tried to find something to say. Anything. I am rarely without words, but I was stumped. I did not want my mom to think I was ungrateful. I appreciate that she picked something that she thought I would like. Well, in truth, she bought it because I ought to like it. I mean, who doesn't want a Coach purse, right?

My stammering on Christmas Eve was obviously unconvincing because my mom asked me on the phone this morning about the purse. I know her feelings are hurt, and I don't want them to be. I want to gush over the purse and exude enthusiasm from my pores, but it isn't in me.

I told her the truth.

I told her I thought it was a thoughtful gift, but that I never pictured myself wearing a Coach purse. That she knew I liked a more simplistic style. I could hear the sigh and eye-rolling as she agreed before she tried to convince me how I could use it on a night out with girlfriends.

I let it go at that. I did not have the energy to discuss the fact that going out with girlfriends requires one to actually have girlfriends. To have schedules that match. To have husbands home from work on time and children who behave.

I will keep the purse, and I will use it when Hubbie and I go out to dinner some time. I will do it because I love my mother. I know it will make her happy, and it will make me happy to know I made her happy.

When I entered the world of motherhood four years ago, I had no idea what a mindfuck it would be. All of the parameters by which I defined myself have changed or disappeared. I struggle to redefine myself every day. It's hard to feel cool when your sweatshirt has snail trails of dried snot, there is ketchup smeared on your jeans, and you can't remember the last time you showered in peace.

I may not know always know who I am, but this has been a powerful reminder as to what I am not. This sort of thing just ain't my bag, baby.

8 comments:

Kelly said...

I'm not really a name brand kind of person either...but the best watch I ever owned was a Faux-lex Rolex that my grandmother brought me back from Hawaii. That thing worked like a champ for years and years.

Toasty said...

Funny, I never thought I'd enjoy a Coach anything either, especially not with the logo all over it. But I got a Coach bag (from the outlet!) from Babu which is just plain brown and I like it, especially when I go out without the kids (which is rare). But I also got a wallet with the logo ALL OVER IT, and I thought I'd hate it, but it's not so bad. I don't let it define me, I just have it, and it's better than my old wallet, so I'm happy to have it!

KJ said...

Well, I'D go out on a girl-date with you, but if you brought a Coach purse, I'd think you were a different kind of girl than I thought you were, until you told me that it was a knock off from your mom and you hated it, and then I'd think you were cool again.

For what it's worth.

My mom is notoriously a horrible gift-giver. She always - always either gives me something SHE wants for herself (worked better when I lived with her), or a re-gift. Not to be ungrateful. It's just the troof.

Patois42 said...

I'm chuckling because my mother gave me a Coach purse so I would stop using my The North Face backpack as one. When she visits, I use the purse. Otherwise...no.

Coal Miner's Granddaughter said...

I have four Coach purses give to me by hubby/friend Toni in the last 13 years. I constantly joke that Toni is trying to turn me into a girl because all my makeup is hand-me-down from Toni's Clinique purchases (whenever she gets free make-up from their giveaways, she gives it to me) and all of my heels (all three pairs) are purchased at her recommendations. And? It turns out I like their purses because they last forever. And their leather smells sooooo good.

So, I guess I'm a Coach girl. But Jimmy Choo? All that stuff from Sex in the City? Yeah, I don't get it either.

Irrational Dad said...

heh... I have a $5 business card holder that I use as a wallet.... women are weird.

.:| Melissa.Mizladytaz |:. said...

uh, I don't even know what that is! Well, I know it's a purse. But I've never heard the Coach name before! I've heard of Jimmy Choo, but only because of watching TV, but I have not heard that other name you mentioned.

Yea, name brand and me ... uh, NOT!

If it isn't available at either Walmart, Target or Kmart, chances are, I've not heard of it, and extremely doubtful I own it! LOL

Gypsy said...

I really don't like "signature" anything, so I'm totally with you.