Sunday, December 30, 2007

Dog Owners Are ASSHOLES!!!!

This post is obviously full of blanket statements and and stereotype-based criticisms. If you can't handle it, shut your browser window and come back another day.

We took our kids to one of the local ski resorts this afternoon to do a little ice-skating. It has been a bad day on my end for a lot of reasons. After almost killing Hubbie for being an idiot on several levels, I went into a shop to buy a granola bar or crackers to give the kids as a snack before we came home. I give this tidbit of info only because this the reason I am not in jail. I was not there for THE INCIDENT.

I came back with the snack, and Hubbie told me.

There was a man with several yippie piece-of-shit-good-for-nothing lap dogs walking down the main cobblestone corridor. I had actually seen the man when I came out of the shop because I heard him yelling and screaming at the damned things. Turns out the good-for-nothing-asshole-piece-of-shit-
motherfucking ASSHOLE of a dog owner just walked into a shop and left his unleashed bear bait to wait outside. While the other two hairballs rolled around outside the shops making a ruckus, the little brown fucker CAME OVER AND PISSED ON OUR EQUIPMENT BAG!!! And this is after Hubbie had shooed him away.

Oh. My. God.

HE LIFTED HIS LEG AND PISSED ON OUR BAG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Are you fucking kidding me!?!?!?!?!?!?

Hubbie told me not to freak out but all I heard was WAH WAH WAH "dog" WAH WAH WAH "pissed" WAH WAH WAH "bag" WAH WAH WAH "man". I don't know how many times he had to repeat himself because I could not register what he was saying. And with my two kids in the stroller I was trying so hard to watch my mouth.

Asshole Dog Owner came back with a bottle of 409 and asked if that was acceptable to clean our bag. He sprayed and sprayed to clean it off. I couldn't even look at him, I was shaking so bad. When he was done he said Thank you for being so understanding. One would think it was a sincere apology, but there was not one contrite vibe coming off of this guy. Not in the way he talked, not in the way he carried himself. Nothing.

Hubbie disagrees and says that the man was very apologetic. I don't give a shit. Who the fuck does that? Who lets their dogs run free in a very public, very crowded area? Especially with that kind of behaviour?

I think he should have paid us for a new duffel bag. I was too chicken shit to say something to the guy at the time. It's my own fault for being such a wuss. So now we have to see if we can wash the damned bag.

And yes, I know not all dog owners are assholes or irresponsible dumbasses. Don't flood my comment box with evidence to the contrary. If you feel the need to do so, see the first paragraph of this post.

5 comments:

Patois said...

That's freakin' outrageous! I thought about following your direction and coming back another day -- 'cause I'm a dog owner -- but I decided to plow through. I can't believe this guy. Stupid dog owner! I'd have been beside myself with anger.

Heather said...

Holy friggin' crap. I would have freaked. But, I'm too meek with strangers to say anything. I, too, would have probably accepted the 409 without incident and then wigged on the way home.

OK, off topic, but still dealing with animal smells. I used to dive a lot at Crystal River, FL. Full of manatees and their poo. My dive gear stunk of it, and therefore our car did, too. Febreze helped with the odor. Once we used a liberal amount (after scrubbing and vacuuming), no more manatee poo smell. Maybe that would help? :-)

Heather said...

Oh, and? Cat owners can be assholes, too. I just loooooove (note sarcasm) Fletcher, the black cat from down the street who is let loose at all hours. Not only does he hunt the birds at my feeders, but he craps in and digs up my flower beds.

I mean, come on. Keep your cat indoors like me!

OK, off the soapbox now. No more commenting, I promise....

MilitaryMom said...

Personally, I think pets should NEVER be allowed in public, except when you are walking them, ON A LEASH, in your neighborhood. I have a dog, and I would never bring her out in public. But then I have mine trained to behave too. You were right to be so pissed, I would have freaked.

Not Afraid to Use It said...

We are cat owners and I agree--if you have a cat that pisses everywhere, do not let it go out onto other people's property. I understand that with both dogs and cats there is a "grace" period until they learn where their property line it. But if they don't learn, that is what the invisible fence is for. And if you don't want to spend the money on that, keep them in the house. Dogs AND cats! LOL